Christmas songs are annoying. Here’s the problem, I want to get in the Christmas mood, and if television has taught me anything it’s that “the best way to spread Christmas Cheer is singing loud for all to hear.”
Hence I don’t feel Christmas-fantastic = forcing myself to listen to Christmas Music to make this happen.
But I’m also a Christmas Song Snob. Just ask my new Pandora Christmas station. I put in “Bing Crosby, Glee, The Carpenters, Ella Fitzgerald, JohnDenverAndTheMuppets:AChristmasTogether (have proclaimed it to be one word now, and will not refer to is as anything differently, although possibly by acronyms, because that is a long word), Barenaked Ladies (Holiday), and All I Want For Christmas is You (love actually version).” And Pandora made me a radio station.
Well, I like Bing Crosby and all, and I think he has a sweet gig as the freakin “voice of Christmas” (which is way better than Vincent Price’s gig being the voice of Halloween, because I don’t even like that holiday), but I don’t want to hear EVERY song he’s ever done. And, trust me, he has done like 38 christmas albums.
And Glee (holiday) sometimes freaks me out. And puts a lot of Brittany Spears Christmas on here by default.
I’ve dis-owned the song “the little drummer boy” and “the 12 days of Christmas” (except the JDATM:ACT version… see? Even that acronym is long. Imagine if I had written the word again….), I hate "Oh Come, Oh Come, Emmanuel." I also don’t like just a piano solos (sorry that Mormon guy who is BFFs with Kurt Bestor and Richard Paul Evans). Ooh, and I am DONE with Frank Sinatra and Cindi Lauper singing together (yuck!).
So, what is left? Now every-other song is ANOTHER Bing Crosby song. Or ANOTHER version of “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” (I love the one from Elf, but it’s like the slowest version of all-time, and I should know because I’ve heard 6 versions today.) update: this is untrue. New slowest version is by Al Hirt and Ann-Margaret
There just isn’t enough Christmas music. Which doesn’t make sense because you really only listen to it a month of the year at best. Three weeks if I’m in charge. Plus, all the new things “Christmas Shoes,” “Where is the line to see Jesus” and other blatant attempts to make people cry and feel sad they aren’t good enough make me want to punch people in the face (huge backfire on the record company’s part…).
I guess I’ll just have to find more ways to find the Christmas spirit. Like freezing my fingers off while looking at lights. (that will make me thankful Jesus was born, right?)
3 comments:
I don't do this often, so I must make a point of letting you know that I really did laugh out loud at that Christmas Shoes comic. Priceless. :)
I SO hear you on this. And yes, WHERE did you find that awesome Christmas Shoes comic? It's perfect!
From the sounds of it, you hate every song I put on the cd I sent you!!! lol Bah Humbug.
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